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Thursday, September 4, 2008

ADDIE: There's no feelings of guilt if you walk the talk

posted by BOFarrell at 7h14

by Huntley Addie

I don’t know about you, but sometimes when I pull up to an intersection downtown, I just want to get out of my car and run away.
I hate feeling guilty about owning my car or having that compact disc in the CD player or that I can afford my iPod shuffling through 392 of my favourite tunes. I don’t like it when I question my clothes or my shoes or whether my cologne is really necessary.
I hate feeling guilty for being.
And yet, many intersection interactions downtown leave me questioning my fortune on this planet.
These squeegee-carrying, may be homeless but able-bodied window-washers or sign-bearing destitute people, parading through traffic at red and yellow lights, always make me squirm in my skin. I always end up searching for loose change. Or, I end up shrugging at them helplessly or rudely ignoring them.
Most of all, I often end up feeling badly.
And more often than not, I’m driving downtown specifically to avoid feeling badly. I’m going downtown for a dinner date or a show or to meet up with friends. Typically, these outings cost a fair amount. But I don’t want to come home feeling miserable, nor miserly.
There is a time and a place to feel badly for those in poor circumstance, but we shouldn’t feel guilty unless that guilt is deserved.
I used to be particularly prone to this type of guilt. But recently, much has changed, mainly as I have realized I can’t save everyone. So, I do what I can.
Writing this column and teaching, as I do, has reminded me that I really have to watch what I say. Thus, I pick my causes with clarity and reason, and then, I put my money where my mouth is.
Opening up an email a few months ago, I was graced by a letter from a woman named Fiona.
She had just read my back-to-back columns on Tony Proudfoot and his battle with Lou Gehrig’s disease.
She wrote: “Your last two articles were inspirational to me and have given me the perfect idea and way to celebrate my 50th birthday.
“I went down to Clints (in Pointe Claire) and booked it as the venue for my birthday/fundraiser for ALS. I am asking each of my guests not to spend any money on cards (I will have a sign-in memory book) or gifts (after 50 years, I don’t need anything!) but instead to donate money or cheques for research into finding a cure for this horrific disease.
“We do know Tony and his wife but have not seen them lately. My older daughter played hockey on Tony’s daughter’s team and we were sad to hear about how this disease is affecting his family. But when I read his comments about his life in your columns, my sadness changed into admiration and respect for one hell of a strong guy!”
Fiona’s 50th birthday celebration at Clints is this Saturday at 7 p.m. All donations are to be made to ALS Society of Quebec (through the Tony Proudfoot Fund).
She casually picked a cause, and put her money where her mouth was. And it sounds like it is going to be a great party to boot.
Now that I had “opened my mouth” with regards to ALS, I had done job one. Fiona has inspired me to take the next step.
Or, should I say, steps.
The ALS Society of Quebec is running its eighth annual Walk for Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis on Sept. 20, and I have registered to walk. I have joined Team Proudfoot proudly.
Last year, I missed the walk, but it was there that I first learned about Tony. Meeting the former football star gave me a cause, and I am thoroughly excited to walk the talk that I have espoused.
If giving some of your lunch money or spare change to squeegee-touting corner window washers is your cause, then go for it! Speak up and, like birthday girl Fiona, take some action to make a difference.
If tackling ALS is up your alley, then visit www.sla-quebec.ca or email info@sla-quebec.ca, and take some strides with the new Tony Proudfoot team on Sept. 20.
No matter what, if you say you want to help a cause, then just do it. Don’t be all guilt ridden over would’ve, could’ve, should haves.
After all, guilt should be reserved strictly for those who champion one thing, and then do nothing about it.
Huntley Addie teachers English and journalism at John Rennie High School.
kathunt@videotron.ca